Tool Tools you acquired that are useless

[whydontu]

Keeping religion out - but IMHO whoever designed that portion of us males must have been an engineer. Who else would have tried to make a system more efficient by designing it to be dual purpose - both pleasure and waste water management. Then to prove they were an engineer, they unnecessarily complicated the design by putting the damn prostate in the middle.
(I’m pretty sure the drawings were double stamped.)

And added a quite sophisticated thought-controlled three-way valve system. Too bad the thought-control software can be quite buggy.

When training young industrial valve specialists, I describe the perfect valve:

Requires no external source of power to operate.
Seals bubble-tight bi-directional shut-off.
Can pass all three common material phases of gas, liquid, or solids as required, in any combination, and prevent solids flow while allowing regulated flow of gasses.
Independent emergency pressure relief without the interference of process control.
Automatic reset after emergency relief.
Independently adjustable opening and closing speed.
Provides user with audible feedback of process conditions.

The sharper students figure out what I'm describing.

 

[Susquatch]

The sharper students figure out what I'm describing.

Some don't? You need better entry qualifications.

 

[jorogi]

So as seems to be usual with me I don't quite fit in the box. The item I'm about to put forward is not a tool but a part of a tool and I'll wager there'll be more than a few of you who don't immediately say "oh yeh, exactly "
Over the years I have owned a lot of chainsaws, good ones that cost a lot of money. Never really formed a brand loyalty, my favorite at any time would be different than the year before. The ones I'm thinking of though are the new Stihls and some of you will now have already shouted out a few expletives and the name of the part. The caps. Used to be so simple, one piece, no moving parts, no alignment requirements, you just screwed them on or off and they even had a scrench recess for that little extra snork. Now they have the new improved version, multiple parts, non intuitive alignment, bad seals, expensive replacement. It's designed to make you scream "ferkin engineers !", or in my case go orange or red. And don't get me going on their "I" and "O" ignition switches.

John

 

[Susquatch]

The caps

I have several chain saws and several in the past. My current big saw is a husky industrial model. But I have no clue what you are talking about.

What caps John?

And what is a scrench?

 

[JustaDB]

I use my dremel rotary tool all the time. I've never understood the hatred towards them.

My FIL never had his Dremel beyond arm's reach. Swore by them. Gave him one of those flexible extension shafts for Christmas years ago, he thought he was in Nirvana. Me, I've never seen the utility. I have a PA version that's been used, I think, once in the last 5 years or so.

 

[JustaDB]

Most useless tool I ever bought? Years ago (40-odd?) I bought a Craftsman POS from Sears. It was some sort of an adjustable nut driver thingy w/ 6 "fingers" that expanded & contracted to grip hex nuts & bolt heads as you turned the handle. Allegedly worked both loosening & tightening. The harder you twisted, the better the grip. Allegedly.

I think I still have it, somewhere. It still pisses me off just thinking about it...

 

[JustaDB]

What caps John?

Oil tank caps.

And what is a scrench?

A combination flat screwdriver/spark plug wrench. Older Stihls had a slot in the oil tank cap that the screwdriver end of the scrench fit into. Very handy if you happened to over tighten the cap. Which, of course, everyone did.

 

[Susquatch]

A combination flat screwdriver/spark plug wrench. Older Stihls had a slot in the oil tank cap that the screwdriver end of the scrench fit into.

I see. Never had either problem.

So that's called a scrench eh. My outboards all had them too. Never used them on a cap. Never needed to. I have Sus torque. Always thought the screwdriver end was to adjust idle mixture/speed and on the saw to adjust the chain. Great little tool. Nice name for it too.

Thx!

 

[CWret]

What caps John?

And what is a scrench?

Further to what @JustaDB said and @jorogi cursed - this is the complicated oil/gas cap that Stihl uses

These caps take some getting use to but at least they don’t leak and a half turn is all that’s needed. That doesn’t mean i like them, i just put up with them cause i like the saw.
The wrench it comes with has 2 size sockets and a flat screwdriver end. One socket fits the spark plug and the other is needed to loosen the chain bar so you can use the screwdriver end to tighten the chain. Very handy. I never knew it had a name but scrench is perfect. My saw never goes anywhere without the plastic chain guard. Stuck in the plastic is the scrench and the very small (Stihl suppled) screw driver for carb adjustments.

 

[CWret]

BTY - this saw belongs in ‘the tools i always wanted’ thread, but i put it here because of the gas/oil cap discussion.
It is one of Stihl’s arborist models. It is light weight, well balanced, and powerful. A joy to use but not cheap considering it’s relatively small size. I only use the expensive canned gas that has zero ethanol. That gas is well worth the $10 /liter to avoid any problems, especially if you are like me and only use it occasionally for half an hour or so.

 

[Dan Dubeau]

Ahhhh, the affectionately known "flippy cap" About 50% of my Stihl equipment has them, and about 50% of those make me want to toss the entire saw/trimmer in the bush sometimes. I much prefer the old screw caps. But the flippy caps are ok IF you are careful. But I've been known to dump a tank of premix or bar oil a time or two.....

I DID score a pretty good deal on my Fs110r trimmer though, because the owner thought the tank/caps were broken, and coupled with the fact it needed a carb clean/kit I think I paid $40 for it. Tank caps were fine, albeit a bit temperamental, and the carb rebuild cost about $25. I recently put another complete carb on it, but that thing has help me reclaim a lot of land, and paid for itself many times over. So "thanks" flippy caps......

 

[Dan Dubeau]

BTY - this saw belongs in ‘the tools i always wanted’ thread, but i put it here because of the gas/oil cap discussion.
It is one of Stihl’s arborist models. It is light weight, well balanced, and powerful. A joy to use but not cheap considering it’s relatively small size. I only use the expensive canned gas that has zero ethanol. That gas is well worth the $10 /liter to avoid any problems, especially if you are like me and only use it occasionally for half an hour or so.

That's a nice saw. I have a few different models from over the years, but the one that gets the most use is my little ms170. Cheap crappy homeowner saw that I bought used and beat up for $60. It's so light, and great for trail maintenance. When I need the bigger ones, they're great to have, but the 170 is usually the one I reach for first. I always wanted a little top handle stihl/husky, but I think the next saw I buy will take batteries.....

 

[Susquatch]

I much prefer the old screw caps. But the flippy caps are ok IF you are careful. But I've been known to dump a tank of premix or bar oil a time or two.....

I don't know what the problem they tried to fix is. I've never had an issue with the regular caps. NEVER. Why fix something that isn't broken?

but I think the next saw I buy will take batteries.....

I do love my big husky industrial.

But I ADORE my Dewalt 20V Chainsaw. Ever since I got it, the husky hardly ever gets used. In fact, only for big tree trunks. Limbing and yard work gets done on batteries. Its one of those tools that you never knew how much you would like it till you have one.

 

[Dan Dubeau]

Ya, I've wanted a little makita top handle for a long time. I use my 18v makita recip saw with a 12" pruning blade for a lot of stuff too.

Not heating full time with wood anymore, I really don't "need" the big saws, but they still come in handy. Probably about 80% of my needs can be serviced with a polesaw, ms170, or recip saw. I'm going to machine an adapter so I can use my stihl shaft heads (pole saw, hedge trimmer) on my new Maktia straight shaft trimmer. If I get that and a battery chainsaw, i'll probably go a long time between firing the gas saws up. I might actually switch to tru fuel (or similar), so I don't have to worry about carbs running afoul with such little use.

 

[historicalarms]

I just love my Stihl electric chain saw. i have owned several different make over the years but my last gas saw was a Stihl 180 that served me well. I cut 2 or 3 cords of wood every year for 5 yrs before that little motor lost its desire.
I , myself was running out of desire to pull on another damn cord anymore so hid my head in shame & bought the "easy one".
I've had that saw for 3 yrs now and still cut 2-3 cords a year. This year I did a little yard changes on trees and took down a couple 60 ft spruce, one had a stump base of 22 inches the other 18" and that little saw never torqued out once cutting full bar depth to buck those trees up. I was amazed at the "no quit" atitude of that saw.
The real bonus with that thing is the weight and ease of use compared to a gas saw, I can stick with a job myself much longer than I could even with that little 180

 

[Darren]

Since we derailed to saws.....I burn 10-12 bush cords a year in my house and shop. My Husky 562xp is the best saw i ever bought. It absolutely rips Second best saw is my modded Stihl 025. I paid 20 bucks for it. Had the original chain on it. Guy didn't know it should be tensioned...etc...he knew nothing. Thought it was worn out. New chain and a quick card adjustmet and it rips for a light limbing saw. It turs about 15k rpm.

Worst saw is the Stihl ms180 .... so gutless, but it starts easy....

Worst tool ever are automotive electrical test leads called load-pro. Never used them, spent 200ish bucks off the Snap On truck.

 

[Arbutus]

Most useless tool. How about a live centre with 15 thou eccentricity?
Video: Eccentric centre

 

[Susquatch]

Most useless tool. How about a live centre with 15 thou eccentricity?
Video: Eccentric centre

Can you fix it?

Several members have fixed theirs.

Fixing one of mine is on my Project list. Some how or another I managed to brinell the bearing in it. I don't have any idea how I did that. Just one day it was lumpy. It used to be my favorite center. Perfect size, shape, and precision.

Bought it from KBC 25 years ago and have used it frequently so I guess I can't complain. Still......

 

[trevj]

Since we derailed to saws.....I burn 10-12 bush cords a year in my house and shop. My Husky 562xp is the best saw i ever bought. It absolutely rips Second best saw is my modded Stihl 025. I paid 20 bucks for it. Had the original chain on it. Guy didn't know it should be tensioned...etc...he knew nothing. Thought it was worn out. New chain and a quick card adjustmet and it rips for a light limbing saw. It turs about 15k rpm.

Worst saw is the Stihl ms180 .... so gutless, but it starts easy....

Worst tool ever are automotive electrical test leads called load-pro. Never used them, spent 200ish bucks off the Snap On truck.

I moved to Alberta in 2000, and bought a brand new Stihl 026, shortly afterwards. Still got it, still runs like a top. We heated almost entirely with wood for three out of the four years I was in Edmonton. Cost me gas, oil, files, the odd bar, and chains. And a $20 carb kit it really did not need, but it got anyways. Darn thing is old enough to vote, plus a bit, and I can still get parts!
A friend picked up two saws off the roadside, one was a smaller Stihl, which he kept, the other was a hopped up Husky 288, with a full wrap and a Hightop filter housing. He gave it to me, said it starts but won't run. I fired it up, and popped the chain brake off....
Since I got back to the farm, I have been inheriting the cast-offs from my cousin the Faller, got a 461 Arctic (Heated grips), that I have been using a lot the last 6-8 years, and a 661 Arctic, that had a scuffed cylinder, That one, and all it's new parts, is still in a box under the bench...

Worst tool ever, a laundry list of cordless tools and devices that inevitably took more dicking about with to make work, if the batteries had not just crapped the bed, than it did to do the work with hand tools. Much to blame for my VERY late entry in to the battery power tools game! You gotta understand, I bought entire $9.99 Flea Market socket sets when I needed that "ONE" magical size socket that I could not find anywhere else (19/32", FWIW, was the best fit I could find for the head studs on my Norton Commando, and no Interwebs to simply look up the best place to buy Brit Tools!). Needless to say, Standards were pretty low, provided they were commensurate with the price paid (Ie: as long as it came cheap enough, nasty 'didn't matter'!) The aforementioned Battery tools, they cost rather a lot, for what crap they turned out to be!

 

[Susquatch]

I fired it up, and popped the chain brake off....

If I had a nickel for every time I fixed a chain saw that way. I don't think people who don't know about the brake should be allowed anywhere near a chainsaw.